#58: Children-Meeting them Where they Are

Each child is different, so why do we think we’re supposed to show up the same for each one? “Consistency” can be a trap. Discover how to connect with your children in ways that are just as unique they are, and your effectiveness (and influence for good) can truly skyrocket.

Leslie Householder is an award-winning, international best selling author of The Jackrabbit Factor, Portal to Genius, and Hidden Treasures. Having homeschooled her family for nine years, she understands first-hand the challenges and worries parents face in an attempt to bring out the best in children and to prepare them for successful adulthood.

Originally recorded at the Mesa, AZ Winter Homeschool Conference on February 23, 2019

Visuals mentioned on the audio:

Here is a map of the goal-oriented Zelda player’s path, only doing what is minimally necessary to get the tools and skills needed to solve the main puzzle in the center:

Here’s a map of the Zelda player who avoids the final test (center) until they’ve discovered and solved EVERYTHING there is to discover and solve before ending the game:

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#57: Disappointments, Marriage, and Miracles (part 2)

This is part TWO of two on the topic of disappointments, marriage, and miracles. Learn about what to do when your spouse is not on the same page with you about goals. Discover how rare faith principles can also be applied to concerns not related to money. If you have ever been hurt or disappointed and feel hesitant to dream again, listen to this episode.

Click here for part 1

Originally recorded in Mendon, Utah on Oct 11, 2018

Resources mentioned:

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#56: Disappointments, Marriage and Miracles (part 1)

This is part ONE of two on the topic of disappointments, marriage, and miracles. Learn about God’s moment to moment sustenance, and how, if we’re not careful when we feel stressed, our “level of thinking” will remind us of all the OTHER things we should be stressed about as well. Learn a simple adjustment that helps you pray in a way that is in harmony with the laws, for better results. If you have ever been hurt or disappointed and feel hesitant to dream again, listen to this episode.

Click here for part 2

Originally recorded in Mendon, Utah on Oct 11, 2018

Resources mentioned on the audio:

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New Graduate: Stephanie Lee

Desperate for $6000

I’m pleased to present Stephanie Lee as a new Mindset Mastery Honors Graduate!

In the Mindset Mastery program, students are instructed on the laws and principles that activate unseen help. That unseen help orchestrates resources, connections, and/or impressions that nudge the students toward all they need to realize their goal. In Phase 1, they practice what they’ve learned on an inconsequential goal – something NOT connected to anything they’re intensely concerned about. This helps them experience success without undue stress, to build the mental muscle memory they need to apply what they learn to a goal of greater significance in Phase 2.

Stephanie was already a student of the self-paced Mindset Mastery program since 2016, but didn’t quite complete it. So when she had the opportunity to join the Guided version of the program, she jumped on it. And now, here we are just a few months later, congratulating her on becoming an Honors graduate!

Rainbow, Please?

Here is Stephanie’s Phase 1 (inconsequential) goal report in her own words:

8:39 am. Good morning from water-logged Oregon! As part of the Guided Mindset Mastery group, it was time to choose an inconsequential goal. (If you have a chance to sign up for a future session, I HIGHLY recommend it!!)

I decided to not overthink it, and just see what popped up in my head that fit this criteria:

    1. It couldn’t be something I could buy.
    2. It couldn’t be something I had lost (there’s a reason and story behind this one that I won’t get in to here.)
    3. It couldn’t be something that required another person.

So, the first thing that popped into my head was “a rainbow”. That sounded fun, so I did a little journaling around it because I have been consistent in my overthinking/doubting/overanalyzing in the past…:

    1. My IDEAL rainbow is a real one, in the sky, weather related, SEEN IN PERSON.
    2. Bumper stickers of rainbows are allowable.
    3. Any other sort of manmade rainbow counts (I’m looking at you, Pink Floyd album cover…)
    4. Regardless of what kind of rainbow I see, it will stick out like a sore thumb and really catch my attention.
    5. I will log each sighting in a note on my phone.

I was having fun writing this list. …I was being aware of my propensity to doubt the way a thing shows up like I have in the past, because previously, I would only have one vision of how it COULD show up.

[But then I wondered…] Is my list of allowables increasing my chances of seeing a rainbow in a way that is in line with the principles, or is my list a sneaky way of putting demands on the laws that aren’t mine to put there? If I want to see a rainbow in real life, but I allow all the other versions to count, am I lacking faith?

…I decided to sit on the rainbow idea for a day or two, and if I didn’t feel more clarity around it, I was thinking I would change goals…

A few HOURS later…

UPDATE (already): I’m floored. 🌈

Today, at 1:32pm, I was out in the Applegate Valley here in flooding Southern Oregon with my husband. He had called me mid morning at work and asked if he could swing by and pick me up so that I could help him unload some logs he needed to deliver to a job. Here are some relevant fun facts:

    • He NEVER needs my help at his work. We like separate work lives. He’s a carpenter and has always been incredibly independent when it comes to his work. For him to call me after he has his work hat + momentum going this early in the day is so rare.
    • He rarely works with logs that he needs help moving.
    • We rarely go out to the Applegate. It’s not on the way to anything.
    • I didn’t remember this place in the picture existed and I certainly didn’t remember it having a rainbow fence.

So, considering my conundrum below, you can imagine how shocked and joyful I felt as we drove by it. I made my husband pull over across the street so I could get the whole fence in my picture.

🌈The laws are real and alive EVEN IN MY OVERTHINKING. Even sometimes very quickly! This is such a gift to me today and I am excited to keep playing with the laws. 

Desperate for $6000 / Guilt and Shame

Stephanie’s Phase 2 goal was a much bigger endeavor, and pretty big and scary to her. Here’s what she did with what felt like an impossible financial situation:

Initially, the goal was to generate about $6000 to pay my cousin and his wife their share of profits from a rental we invested in together. I had received some incorrect information that stated my cousin could not legally receive a penny of profit until his IRA that financed the purchase of the home was paid back, and that it was only going to get paid back upon the sale of the house. So, I had believed that I wouldn’t have to give him their share until the house sold (in a year or two from now).

The past couple of years brought the darkest times of my life and the hardest financial struggles. I used my cousin’s profits to get us through some emergencies without asking him. I believed I would be able to replenish it easily. Things got harder, and I hadn’t been able to repay him yet.

I learned late last year that the monthly profits COULD go to him. I was so scared and angry at myself. I knew I had used the money for needful things but it wasn’t my money to use. I felt HUGE guilt and shame. I set the goal of generating that money by June 18th this year when my cousin and his wife were here on our land for our family reunion.

Not only did I NOT generate a single penny of that, but I also fell behind in other areas financially. I really had to rely on the lessons in the Mindset Mastery program to help me know how to navigate all that. At one point I had a phone call with Trevan, my Mindset Mastery Program Guide, where he helped me SO much. The time had come where there seemed to be NO WAY the money could be generated in time, but I knew that the months of effort had grown ME in big and important ways. I needed help recalibrating my approach with the goal and what to do if the goal didn’t happen in time. (It involved other people, so I didn’t feel like the pregnant woman analogy quite fit.)

Trevan helped me realize that the goal so far had been incredibly fear-driven and that it would not be accomplished with fear as the force behind it. At least not in a way that honored my journey up to that point, and the growth Heavenly Father wanted for me. Trevan helped me see that the REAL goal was ACTUALLY to maintain a loving and peaceful relationship with my cousin and his wife.

That became my new goal.

I wrote a new vision statement around it. I imagined having the conversation and telling my friend afterwards, “That was the most incredible thing! The conversation was SO easy, and the solution to the money issue worked out in such a surprising and beautiful way that I hadn’t even thought of before!”

Last week, that exact thing happened with my cousin. He and his family were here for our family reunion. The opportunity to talk privately was really challenging to create, with all that was going on. As tempting as it was to hope it just wouldn’t happen, I KNEW I needed this to be resolved. I prayed for a window of time to easily open.

On the last day, when everyone was packing up to leave, it was much more calm and relaxed than usual. My cousin came in my kitchen to chat about something totally unrelated while I washed dishes. My heart was pounding because I KNEW this was the opportunity… I was praying gratitude for the upcoming conversation going well… for it being peaceful and easy, for me to have the right heart about it, for me to offer the solution/idea that came to me just a couple of days before [of offering him the monthly profits to make up for the lump I had spent].

He asked how the rental was going and I just spilled out the truth. But I felt SO at peace. I didn’t emit an energy of cowardice. I didn’t speak from a place of shame. I told him the misinformation I had received about the rental profits and I told him that I had used the money for needful things and that the most important thing to me is maintaining a loving relationship with them.

I told him of the idea of he and his wife now managing the monthly payments and keeping all the profits instead of us from here on out (the solution/idea that had come to me a few days before). I told him that when the house sold, we would give him any remaining money due to him from our profits. He loved the idea. I apologized for not having an envelope of cash to give him and he said with such kindness “Oh, it’s okay. I don’t really have a need for it so I would probably just spend it on something I don’t need to spend it on, anyway.”

It was the easiest conversation I could have imagined having about it. I could write and write and write about all the feelings I have and the lessons I’ve learned, but I will just stop here and say that the goal was accomplished and it gutted me and grew me in all the ways I needed for these principles to become a PART of me… not just knowledge I have outside of me.

Well done, Stephanie. This is a prime example of coming to realize that the REAL goal isn’t the money. We tend to think we need money to get what we really want – but when we focus instead on what we really want – what the money is for – sometimes those things can be achieved in unexpected ways.

I love how Stephanie used the Mindset Mastery principles to navigate from guilt and shame to hope, healing, and growth. And solutions! Her solution truly was only an idea away.

I am also impressed that even when there was no resolution in sight, Stephanie chose to believe. I can feel her faith when she says, “The time had come where there seemed to be NO WAY the money could be generated in time, but I knew that the months of effort had grown me in big and important ways.”

At the conclusion of the course, I was thrilled to receive the following message from Stephanie:

I’m feeling overwhelmed with gratitude at being able to graduate with honors. It represents profound growth and victory that I never could have imagined a few years ago.

Congratulations again, Stephanie! You’ve done an amazing job!

To learn more about Stephanie and her art courses, ebooks, mentoring, and lots of other goodies, visit her website: stephanieleeart.com. You’ll see that her website is a work of art in and of itself. I especially love her beautiful videos showing her process for creating art.

__________________

What’s YOUR story going to be?

I want to see YOU graduate, too!

Learn more about the Mindset Mastery program HERE.

___________________

The Mindset Mastery Program is not to be confused with the Mindset Fundamentals Ecourse.

The Fundamentals Ecourse provides an introductory exploration into the principles that govern success for effective goal setting. It also fills the gaps to give you a basic but complete understanding of the principles, so that you have a solid foundation on which to develop true mastery. 

By contrast, the Mastery Program is focused on the *implementation* of those principles and the *achievement* of your goals. It is full of interesting assignments that take you step-by-step through two experimental goals, challenging your thought processes, helping you experience success, and setting up a pattern in your thinking that you will be able to utilize over and over for effectiveness with all of your future goals. There is a self-paced version, but we also have a GUIDED version if you want to go through the lessons on a weekly basis with an expert guide. View all your options here.

I hope you’ll join me in one of these programs, so I can help you take your understanding and success to the next level in ALL areas of your life!

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Graduation Announcement: Michelle Taylor

I’m pleased to present Michelle Taylor as a Mindset Mastery Honors Graduate!

I am so proud of the hard work and faith she exhibited to transform her spiritual and financial life. Michelle focused particularly well on the Laws of Vibration and Gestation to allow these blessings to flow more abundantly.

A Struggle with Anxiety

Michelle came into the program after a long history of anxiety, and suffering from past emotional and mental abuse. She had already been studying the principles as much as she could through our free resources, first through the Jackrabbit Factor, then Hidden Treasures, the Visual Aid that Changed Everything video, and various Podcast episodes. Once she was ready, she signed up for the Guided version of the Mindset Mastery course feeling hopeful and determined. She wrote:

I am wife to a great husband and mom to 8 wonderful kids… I have struggled with anxiety for the last 11 years. I struggle with past emotional and mental abuse that I grew up with, and it is hard to feel confident, but things are changing. I have seen a shift in my life and things are getting better. The anxiety has been due to long term focus on negativity and seeing only negativity in my life, so these principles are helping me to change to a more positive or neutral take on the situations…. I look forward to solidifying my faith and pursuing all God has for me in my life. Abundance thinking!

Putting the Laws to the Test

In Phase 1, students learn and practice the laws on something inconsequential, to build muscle memory around faith, belief, and witnessing its effects directly and intentionally. For Michelle’s phase-one goal, she chose to receive a handwritten letter in the mail expressing appreciation.

Here’s her experience in her words:

I was at the mailbox and realized how long it had been since I received a handwritten letter or note from someone. I decided that I wanted to manifest a handwritten note or letter from someone by the end of April. I noticed some things with my thoughts, how impatient I would get and every time I checked the mail, I would get a little disappointed.

While I didn’t doubt for too long, there were small thoughts every now and again. When we got to the end of lesson 12 and knew I had to try and manifest something inconsequential, I thought that I would change my goal, but I had this nagging feeling that I should stick with it. So, I changed the date, but the goal was the same.

On the 11th of May, I received a package from my mother for Mother’s Day. Mind you I am the oldest of 7 daughters and when my mother does something, especially for Mother’s Day, she would do it for everyone, so in the last 16 years since I have been a mother, this has rarely happened. I was not expecting anything from her this year. In the package I received in the mail, was a frame with a saying and a Mother’s Day book. I was so grateful to receive it and ready to read the book, as I started to gather the packaging that kept the frame from breaking, I noticed an envelope. In this envelope was a handmade card with a handwritten message of love and appreciation from my mother.

I know this was a manifestation of my goal. I have tried to discount it, because it was from my mother, or because it was Mother’s Day, but this is not the norm for my mom, or my family and more often than not, I receive nothing. This was definitely God showing me that these principles work…

I loved how Michelle noticed her thoughts about being impatient. The first step to being able to keep our thoughts right is to notice them. This sounds obvious but so many people are not aware of their own thoughts. Once she noticed her impatient thoughts, Michelle was able to use the principles to have faith that the blessings were indeed still on their way.

Financial challenges, getting off public assistance, and the miracle

During the class, Michelle had some difficult financial challenges. As most of you know, I am no stranger to financial difficulties and how terrifying they can be. I was so impressed with the way she used the laws to confront them and I want to share some pieces of her story. She wrote:

During this course, my husband quit a job to work with his dad and get him ready for retirement, since he was struggling to work outside the home. We took a much smaller paycheck in order to not overburden my father in law financially. We were off of government assistance during this time as well, as we felt led to create a vacuum in that way and trust that we would be provided for.

There was so much fear. We were hoping to also use this time to find my husband a job that wouldn’t be so hard on his back as he had had back surgery a couple of years ago. We knew he could go back to his previous job if need be, but we really didn’t want him driving trucks. We thought it would be difficult to find an office job, for the wage he was making driving trucks and delivering propane in our area. So, as we did this we trusted and tried to stay in the mindset of these principles.

We were able to cover food costs, pay all our bills, and have enough for date nights. This was incredible as we didn’t think there was any way we could do this. Of course, I should mention he was delivering pizzas in the evening a few nights a week. It got to a point where all of this extra work was weighing on him.

I set the intention that we could increase our income some way, so that he did not have to do the extra job. Within a week, my father in law stated that he found some extra money and would be able to increase his wage. This was such a relief and it was even better that it didn’t strain my father in law’s income.

A couple of weeks ago, the company my husband was driving trucks for, asked my husband if he would be the head of routing for the trucks, which is an office job, and they are paying him the same rate he made as a driver. What a miracle, because shortly after that, my father in law said that he realized he had a bill to pay worth ten thousand dollars and was relieved that my husband had found employment so soon, since he would not be able to pay my husband anymore.

We didn’t have to worry, stress, or try to control the situation. God knew what we needed, because we had set the intention and he moved everything perfectly. This course has taught me to trust, let go, and be free from fear. I am so grateful….

Michelle’s beautiful children – a big motivator for learning how to live with Rare Faith:

Probably the thing that stood out to me the most in her story is the fact that her father in law’s raise was only temporary, even though they didn’t know it at the time. But it was enough to bridge the gap until the more permanent solution could show up. Isn’t that merciful?? Things like this happen all the time, because even though the Law of Gestation says each idea seed takes a certain amount of time before it can bear fruit, other blessings can show up to hold things together until then. Our job is to believe until it shows. When we doubt, the seedling can wither.

Overcoming Anxiety

Michelle’s phase-two goal also showed a great amount of faith as she overcame old habits of doubt and anxiety to bless the lives of children:

My phase 2 goal consisted of carrying out a youth workshop for kids 12-18 by June 29th, 2019. I wanted to have at least 10 kids there and I wanted to know that the Lord was guiding and directing the process…. I had several terror barriers which God helped me overcome. First was self-confidence that I could even do a workshop to encourage when I dealt with anxiety, but while praying and moving forward, God showed me that I was the right person for this, because I have dealt with anxiety and am overcoming it.

I felt led to do vision boards and knew I would need to provide materials, but money was really tight. I didn’t think I could move forward, but trusted that God would provide for all our needs, since I felt strongly that I was attempting to do the work of God in this way, and bought the things I needed. With 8 children, one of them being a six-month-old, it was difficult to take the time to write down my plan and I wanted to create a PowerPoint to have something for the kids to look at and keep their interest.

A week before the day my husband was planning on watching kids every evening and make dinner, so that I could get everything ready. He became extremely ill for 5 days. He rarely gets sick. Instead of having his help, I ended up helping him and making sure kids needs were met. Needless to say, I wasn’t able to work on the PowerPoint or my plan for the workshop. I was ready to cancel, since at this point there were only two families going and they were going to support me anyway.

I decided I wasn’t going to judge the experience by which people came and decided that I would give my best effort even if my friends were the only ones to come. I decided to press forward, trusting that the words would be given to me when I needed them. The night before I sat down to write out a simple plan, I had the stories and words that I felt led to share and it went very quickly. I was grateful for the Lord’s help. So, I did only have two families come, but between those two families, I had 10 kids be a part of the workshop, with mine, it was 17 in all. It came out so well that one of my friends has a couple of autistic children and they loved it and wanted to know when I might do another one.

Michelle said that she struggled with the self-confidence that she could accomplish her goal. Then she said, “while praying and moving forward, God showed me I was the right person for this.”

This is the Law of Cause and Effect in action! When we pray and move forward, God is able to steer us in the right direction. After all, he can’t steer a parked car.

Michelle finished her vision board story with a hope and vision that I believe will carry her forward in many areas of her life:

I am so grateful for this experience and look forward to doing more with teaching these principles and encouraging and healing souls…. My big goal is to help heal and help people find hope. This is just the beginning.

Again, congratulations, Michelle! You’ve done an amazing job!

__________________

What’s YOUR story going to be?

I want to see YOU graduate, too!

Learn more about the Mindset Mastery program HERE.

___________________

The Mindset Mastery Program is not to be confused with the Mindset Fundamentals Ecourse.

The Fundamentals Ecourse provides an introductory exploration into the principles that govern success for effective goal setting. It also fills the gaps to give you a basic but complete understanding of the principles, so that you have a solid foundation on which to develop true mastery. 

By contrast, the Mastery Program is focused on the *implementation* of those principles and the *achievement* of your goals. It is full of interesting assignments that take you step-by-step through two experimental goals, challenging your thought processes, helping you experience success, and setting up a pattern in your thinking that you will be able to utilize over and over for effectiveness with all of your future goals. There is a self-paced version, but we also have a GUIDED version if you want to go through the lessons on a weekly basis with an expert guide. View all your options here.

I hope you’ll join me in one of these programs, so I can help you take your understanding and success to the next level in ALL areas of your life!

Share