How could I have missed it? We talked about it in Mindset Mastery. I’ve seen Leslie Householder’s Visual Aid That Changed Everything. I’ve read her books, The Jackrabbit Factor and Portal to Genius. I was even dreaming about rabbits, and I still didn’t recognize it!
I had almost $6,000 in taxes due April 18 and was looking for a way to pay them without going into debt. I also wanted to become a facilitator for Leslie’s courses and needed $6,000 for the training. Where could I get $12,000 in a hurry?
About six months previously, I had purchased a course to learn how to run a marketing business. It was a very disorganized course, and I hadn’t figured out how to do it. Maybe I would try it again. Still frustrated after my second attempt, I discovered another company that had a course for $5,000 that seemed a lot more helpful. After much contemplation and prayer and believing it would create the funds I needed, I decided to pay the $2,000 I had already saved for our taxes toward the course and owe them the other $3,000.
I feverishly worked through the material and hit a wall. Pivoting, I hit another wall, and another. I had never experienced something like this before. I felt like a little kid trying to learn a grown-up concept. How could this be? I am a smart person, but I was literally in tears every day.
Maybe I had made the wrong decision! Maybe it wasn’t really my answer! Maybe I should quit!
I wrote in my journal, “I can’t tell if the barrier I am running into for my marketing business is the Spirit telling me it’s the wrong path or if it’s the emotional barrier I need to break through to get to where I am supposed to be.”
Next, I wrote down all the possible fears that could have been blocking me on the path. I concluded that the marketing business didn’t fit with my life’s vision. I had just wanted to do it to make a quick $12,000. So, I quit.
I felt so much better, no more tears. Less stress. I was in sales school for facilitator training now and maybe this is where the money would come from.
Next journal entry: “Was this a terror barrier?” I couldn’t stop thinking about the marketing business. I went back and forth over the next week struggling to decide if it was in fact a terror barrier that had beaten me or the Spirit warning me.
Leslie’s Mindset Mastery course had told me how I could know. So, I asked.
Did I set and intention and become emotional? I had written down our tax amount due and gotten emotional about it being paid.
Did it feel like a good idea consciously? I had gone over the pros and cons with my husband and thought it was a good idea.
Did it feel good subconsciously or in my heart? I had prayed about the decision to start an agency, and felt it was a good decision.
Did I take action? I had hesitated about paying the money, but followed through and paid, then started working through the course material.
Conclusion: My faith had been tested. I had, in fact, hit a terror barrier. And it had won! April 18th came and went, and I didn’t find the money. I am now making payments to the IRS and Visa.
When I look back over my life, I now recognize that there is a distinct difference between what it feels like to receive a “no” answer to prayer or a warning from the Spirit and the few times when the terror barrier has stopped me.
I remember when my husband was considering a job in another country before we were married. When we prayed, the dark heavy feeling in my chest was a definite “no” from the Spirit. Another time, I was booking flights to visit my sister. Again, that dark heavy feeling in my chest warned me to wait and book another day.
The fear and doubt from the terror barrier came only after I had already received the warm glow in my chest, my “yes” answer, and had moved forward in faith.
My experience with the marketing agency has been my most dramatic terror barrier of all. I believe now that I was the closest to breaking through than ever before. The opportunity is still there. I will start again. This time, I will recognize the battle in my brain and face the fear head on.
The terror barrier may have won in my past, but I know I will win in the end.
Learn to recognize how the Spirit speaks to you. Then it will be clear when the terror barrier battle begins. Move forward with faith. Your success is just on the other side.
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