No motivation?

Some time ago I posted the following in the Mindset Mastery program participants private Facebook group:

Just so y’all know… I had a goal recently that did not appear to be going well, right up until the deadline (and yes, in this case, there was a real deadline). It gave me yet another opportunity to test the principles. To choose calmness and assurance. To answer the question without fear, “What will I do if it doesn’t happen?” so that my subconscious mind would stop harassing me about it. To then get back to seeing it done, and feeling the emotions I expected to feel when it was achieved.

There was really no reason that it couldn’t (and shouldn’t) have happened two weeks earlier, except for the subtle impression that it was, indeed, just a test, to see if I would choose belief right up until the end.

It’s a scary thing sometimes to choose belief. We don’t want to be disappointed. We don’t want to put all that effort forth and find out it went unanswered.

But, the mental and spiritual muscles it exercises! The strength and confidence it builds!

The deadline was midnight. At 10pm there was nothing more for me to physically do, so I turned it over to God and went to bed, peacefully and expectantly leaving it in His hands. There was nothing more for me to physically do, but I could fall asleep imagining it done, and feeling gratitude for His help, and fading away in sheer amazement at how it came about.

In the morning, there it was, the email confirming the goal had been achieved, at 12:05 am. Five minutes late, but good enough, because *somewhere* in the world it wasn’t quite midnight 

I count it a win.

Just wanted you to know that no matter how many times you experience this, it stretches you. And that’s a good thing.

Shortly after, I received the following message from one of our Mindset Mastery program participants:

Hi Leslie! Thank you for your post in the Mindset Mastery Facebook group today. It was what I need to keep being reminded of, so I keep going when things get tough or don’t seem like they will produce the desired outcome.

I have a question that I’ve been struggling with:

What do you do when you have zero motivation to do something you know you should?

I recently had a baby and with each of my children I have gained around 10 lbs. With this baby I have gained almost 20. So, needless to say, 4 children later, I am almost 60lbs overweight! Yikes!! I was also diagnosed with gestational diabetes with this last one, and so now I am at risk for type 2 diabetes. Yikes!!

All of this should be enough to do what I know I should – eat healthy and exercise! But do I want to?? Heck no! Why? I don’t know!

Maybe it’s because I am in such a great place emotionally! I am happier than I have been in YEARS! I laugh more than I have in a very long time. Life is great for me! I also love being lazy and eating whatever I want! My logical self checks in and says, “Ya, you may be having fun now, but in a few years from now, your not going to be having very much fun when you’re a diabetic and 200 lbs.” I keep trying to eat healthy and exercise, but I seriously don’t care!! I’m so happy with my life right now, I just don’t care to change my diet and exercise!

Have you ever experienced something like this before? It is a weird feeling to know you need to change something, but yet be so happy and content with where you are in life. Can you help me know how to dissect this thing in my head, or know how to flip this, or think about it differently so that I can have my “From Now On” moment like The Greatest Showman and eat better and be active from now on? Because what I want in the long run is to be super fit and healthy, even into my senior years. But I have no motivation to change my actions. I want to humble myself before I am compelled to be humble. Have you ever experienced something like this?

The short answer is YES, I have felt that way…

In fact, I’d be surprised if there was someone out there who hasn’t felt this way at one time or another, not necessarily about health and fitness, but about whatever it is they should be doing that they’re not doing.

Here’s where I’ve landed with it, and what I told her:

I don’t try to force myself to be motivated anymore. If I want to WANT to be motivated though (yes, I said “want” twice on purpose), then I’ll start by praying, “Please help me want to want to.” Then I just don’t stress it. I’ll keep praying it, and once the desire starts to bubble up a little (because it will, even if only subtly), I’ll let myself imagine how it will feel when I’ve accomplished that thing. Not to motivate myself per se, but just to try it on and see if I really want it.

As long as you don’t outright reject the idea, it will begin to move you, probably imperceptibly at first.

So if and when you’re ready to try it on, maybe just imagine yourself the way you want to be at the next big family vacation. See yourself feeling energetic and keeping up with the kids, feeling free and great and strong.

One thing I’d suggest is feeding your mind with interesting input that can gently move you in that direction. For example, going to the Trim Healthy Mama Facebook page and following it. (Be sure to click the “Following” drop-down button and select the option to “see first” so that it shows up in your news feed every day.)

Their page is super uplifting and motivating, and IF you decide someday to release the extra weight, I recommend doing it their way. You can have treats all the time and you don’t really feel deprived. I dropped 15 pounds in about a month just by making sure I ate something every 2 hours, and by being careful about what foods I combined at the same meal. I think I started by following their page, then maybe a year later I bought their book, which explains their approach and why it works. Sometime after that is when I was finally motivated enough to go for it. Just starting with their posts in your feed can be a gentle beginning.

Hope this helps! Warmly, Leslie

She responded:

Thank you Leslie! That is very helpful! And thank you for that resource I will check it out for sure!

To learn more about Trim Healthy Mama, click here.

To get help with your mindset for creating a new life, click here.

Leslie Householder
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