By Cosette Snarr
My husband suffered from epilepsy—uncontrolled seizures—which made life difficult to say the least. It didn’t help at all that I deeply resented the situation. For years, instead of trying to make the best of things, I complained. I’m embarrassed to say I was critical and ornery most of the time, always looking for a way out, even though leaving him was out of the question.
After years of trying to fix my husband I chose to find something that would take my attention off him and make me happy. I did some research and decided to become a life coach. I went to seminars, read books, got certified, and put into practice all the things I’d been told to do in order to be a success. But it didn’t work, and I couldn’t figure out why. So I did more of the same thing—more seminars, more certifications. Still nothing.
What was wrong with me? I’d done all this stuff to make myself happy and none of it was working. On top of that, things with my husband were worse than ever. Finally, in desperation I went to the Lord and told Him I couldn’t live like this anymore. I was still committed to staying in the marriage, but I needed to learn how to do it with grace rather than a clenched jaw.
I received inspiration to start working on projects with my husband—specifically refinishing furniture. I had to admit, we did work well together and the idea of doing something creative appealed to me. We took a class, bought some supplies and we were off.
I was shocked that within a very short period of time my attitude toward my husband drastically changed. In fact, I felt like I was falling in love with him all over again. I looked forward to him coming home in the evenings and spending time searching for furniture to work on. We had fun discussing our plans and shared in the joy of finished masterpieces. I found myself less bothered by his seizures and focusing on the good things he did.
My husband had seizures for 30 years and within six months of me changing my attitude they stopped. He hasn’t had a seizure now for over six years. I cannot say that changing my vibration is what caused them to stop, but it did change my life. I got to a place where I would have been fine if his condition had remained the same.
Now I understand why things didn’t work when I was doing all the stuff to start a coaching business. I went through the motions, but my thoughts were still focused on how miserable I was. Those are the thoughts that won out. Now not only is my marriage better than it was for decades, but our financial situation is also better—not because I have a thriving business, but because I changed my thinking. Our lives truly are a reflection of our thoughts.
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