Heartaches and Disappointments

Meet Kimee Whipple:

I’m excited and pleased to introduce you to Mindset Mastery Graduate, Kimee Whipple. Kimee courageously faced her fears in the Guided Mindset Mastery class, and met the requirements for graduation at the beginning of July, 2023. She also found gratitude and a closer relationship with God through her journey, despite the heartaches that come with the ups and downs of trying to adopt.

First I’m going to share her Mindset Mastery course experience, but then I want to also talk about the disappointments she faced AFTER completing it. As with all of our graduates, I had some questions for her:

Q. What was your experience with the Phase 1 experiment? (The “inconsequential goal”)

I had an incredible experience with my inconsequential goal for Phase 1 of Mindset Mastery. I really visioned getting delicious organic apples for under $2.00. It did not happen the first week, but I kept believing it would happen. Then the next week I went grocery shopping there were delicious organic crispy apples for $1.79 per pound. I was so grateful and so full of joy.

This was about a month and a half ago and I am still being blessed to buy delicious organic apples for less than $2.00. Miracles do happen when we change our thoughts and act in faith. I am so grateful for all that I am learning. Thank you Leslie and Christy and my wonderful group. I thank God especially!! 

The process always begins with something small, so that you can exercise your faith muscle and then begin applying what you learned from that first experiment to something more important and meaningful. Great job, Kimee. Step one: complete!

Q. What was your bite-sized Phase 2 “difficult, meaningful, or important” goal?

Kimee shared it exactly the way she set it:

“I thank my Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ for helping me successfully complete the Three-Day Cleanse by Dr. Christopher and the Advanced Nine-Day Cleanse by Anthony Williams on April 30, 2023.”

Q. What happened?

She replied:

I will say that the challenges that I took on were more challenging than I thought. There were times that I did not feel too hot, and especially on the three day juice cleanse with fresh pressed organic apple juice. Although I love fresh pressed juice, by the last day I felt like I never wanted to have fresh apple juice again. Ha!

I was excited for the 9 day cleanse because it was raw food based (but with no radical fats, not even avocados, nuts, or seeds, which I love and love to use in my dinner meals). It was a lot of work with juicing organic celery juice to have 32 ounces every morning the first 6 days, and then 32 ounces in the morning and later afternoon the last 3 days, with at least 32 ounces of apple cucumber juice and 64 punches of celery juice on the last day of the cleanse.

I had had issues with my bowels the past couple of months prior to doing these cleanses. I was just not feeling regulated and feeling bloated, and that is why part of my short-term goal was focused on 3-5 good bowel movements a day.

I read my short-term goal, along with my bite-sized every morning, and meditated on it too. Well, I consumed about 3.5 gallons of celery juice in 9 days, and I also had at least 3-5 good bowel movements each day. It was incredible, and my colon was feeling so much better after that, and continues to do so. It was such a good experience for me, and also a reminder that I can do hard things, and I can set and achieve goals. I am so grateful for the Lord’s grace, love, power, and strength I felt the whole time, too, as I focused on Him. 

What I especially love here is how Kimee acknowledges how she physically struggled to achieve her goal at times. The belief in and process of reaching our goals can often be uncomfortable for us mentally, but they can be especially difficult if the process also brings physical discomfort. But rather than let the physical discomfort shake her decision to keep moving forward, Kimee continued to read her short-term and bite-sized goals every morning, bringing her to the exact outcome she desired. Excellent work!

Q. What was your experience facing a fear from assignment/lesson 18? How effective were you at being able to think truth in spite of appearances?

This was a bit of a challenge, and I had to let it go and move onto the next lesson. But I felt ready when I went back to it, particularly because the Lord blessed my husband and I with some Rare Faith-increasing experiences on our adoption journey.

I felt my hope and trust in God had been significantly increased, and that I was ready to return to the fears. I decided to write about my worst fear and tried to do my best to not get attached to it. To be honest it was not as difficult as I thought, particularly because of my increased faith in God and His Son.

I cannot explain it, but after, and since completing that assignment, I have felt this freedom and this heaviness lifted off my shoulders. It was and is so liberating.

I am so grateful to God, and I know that His Son is my strength and He really does lift our burdens and makes them light, particularly when I choose to let go and give Him all my fears. I am so very, very grateful.

Wow! What a sweet and tender testimony of what is possible when we face our fears. Kimee demonstrated courage as she intentionally chose not to hide from her fear, nor pretend that it did not exist. Yes, the ultimate goal is to NOT fear, but as Kimee shows us, it is in facing our fear that we are able to stop the fear. (For more about facing your fear to overcome it, listen to the podcast episode, “How and Why To Fear Not”)

Did you experience a Terror Barrier Breakthrough during the course?

Yes! I totally have, and not just one, but many, particularly with adoption. My precious husband and I have been on this adoption journey for over two years, and it has been one of the hardest things I have done in my life–and I have done a lot of hard things.

I am so very grateful for God’s great goodness and His Grace, too, or I could keep going forward in faith and hope. However, through the time of this course, we were facing a lot of extra challenging things and fears within our adoption journey. But as we applied these principles from this course I have been so blessed to be a part of the past 14 weeks, we have overcome many fears (Terror Barriers) and our faith, trust, and hope in the Lord and also His timing have increased significantly. 

These are truly the type of student-stories that remind me of the “why” behind this work. Sure, helping someone reach money or business goals is rewarding, but it’s the stories of how it brings someone closer to God and strengthens their relationship with Him that fills my team’s soul with joy. 

Q. What would you tell someone who is facing their fear right now?

The counsel I would love to share is “Just Keep Going—with Faith!” I would love to share this quote too: 

“Do you know what I am grateful for? That I didn’t give up—or resist. If I had given in to my desperate desire to escape from those meetings, I would have missed an opportunity to increase my faith and receive a rich outpouring of love and support from my Heavenly Father. I learned of His mercy, the miraculous enabling power of Jesus Christ and His Atonement, and the powerful influence of the Holy Ghost.

“In spite of my weakness, I learned that I can serve; I can contribute when the Lord is by my side if I just keep going—with faith. Regardless of the size, scope, and seriousness of the challenges we face in life, we all have times when we feel like stopping, leaving, escaping, or possibly giving up. But exercising faith in our Savior, Jesus Christ, helps us overcome discouragement no matter what obstacles we encounter.

“Just as the Savior finished the work He was given to do, He has the power to help us finish the work we have been given. We can be blessed to move forward along the covenant path, no matter how rocky it becomes, and eventually receive eternal life.” ~Carl B. Cook~

I feel this way, too. As I have looked back on my life, I have not pursued many things because of fear. I let fear stop me. But then there are times that I look back now and I broke through the “Terror Barrier” (I did not know it was that then), and accomplished some amazing things. You have potential—DIVINE potential.

These laws work. I have seen them work during this course, and my life has changed—God has helped me change. So now, when I feel nervous or fearful or anxious, I can recognize what is actually happening in my mind and body. It is powerful. I know God has the power, and will give it to us to truly overcome the world. 

Thank you for sharing your experiences and vulnerability with us, Kimee. I believe your words will help others be reminded that God has the power to help them overcome their challenges, too.

Now, fast forward six weeks…

AFTER Kimee graduated – a Dead End on the Road to Adoption

About six weeks after completing her graduation requirements, Kimee sent me an email:

August 18, 2023

Hey Leslie—

I just wanted to send you this, so you know about our adoption journey. Since you were going to be writing about me in your newsletter, this is might affect it. Sorry.

Dear Family,

Destin and I want you to all know how very grateful we are for all the prayers, thoughts, love, support, encouragement, and all you have done for us on our adoption journey.

To help you understand our decision more clearly, please watch this short wonderful clip:

So, now that you have watched this video, we want you to know that we have come to a “dead end” on our adoption road. This has been very emotional and heart breaking, but after much fasting and prayer and discussion, we choose to trust God’s will, though we do not understand.

We trust in His omniscience and we know He loves us. We know that the past two and a half years has not been a waste of time and energy, but we know that as He has promised “. . .all these things shall give thee experience and shall be for thy good” (D&C 122:7-8). We choose to grow.

Thank you again for all your love.

Love always,

💖 Kimee and Destin

August 31, 2023 – My reply:

Hi Kimberly, I’m sorry …. Some days I just wish we could get clear answers why things have to be so hard sometimes. If you don’t mind my asking, I am curious to know about your “dead end”…. No pressure. Either way, thank you for the update. I wish you both all the best as you move forward on your new road.

Also, even though things haven’t turned out the way you hoped, I still believe your experience can help others. Even this conclusion, and your share about Wrong Roads. Do you mind if I still create a spotlight about your story? … Let me know what you think. Warmly, Leslie

September 6, 2023 – Kimee’s response:

Hey Leslie,

I just love and appreciate you so very very much!! …. I do not mind sharing a little bit.

I have dreamed about becoming a mother since I was 11 years young. I dreamed about having my children at home with a midwife and as natural as possible. All I ever wanted to be was a wife and a mother and long story, I did not meet my husband until I was 38 and I was a few months shy of my fortieth birthday when we got married. But, he was definitely worth all the waiting and broken engagement and all the challenges the years before. He is just so wonderful and I am so eternally grateful I have him.

I was born with a rare congenital disorder, which God helped me learn in 2017 prior to me meeting Destin that I would be unable to have children of my own. Instead of discouragement, I felt peace and protected, because I never thought the condition would affect me from having my own children, but I learned that if I got pregnant it would kill me and most likely the baby, too.

But I was working in the Youth Center in the Temple at the time (I did that for 10 years until Mesa closed for renovation) and I saw beautiful eternal families coming together under the sealing power with children whose birth parents chose to make an adoption plan for their baby. This was where I turned, and Destin and I turned.

It took a while after we got married, through direction from the Lord, before we actually started the process. It was not like we thought it would be, and we learned so much, but we faced many many hard things. An emotional roller coaster for sure. I could write a book on that.

Because Destin has four other children (ages 13, almost 18, 19, and just about 22 at the end of this month), we learned that it would be much more challenging to get matched.

Well, after two and a half years we finally got matched. There were a lot of challenging things going on at the same time with a medical emergency and horrific fraud experience, in which we lost so much money, and then we got our dead end in a very unexpected way.

It was a very clear sign that we are not supposed to adopt. This was totally unexpected. I did not understand why it had to end this way. I just did not understand and still do not, but I choose to trust God.

I have been using all the things that I learned in Mindset Mastery and my dream with our precious baby. I have never felt so broken, empty, and totally rock bottom. I thought I knew what rock bottom feels like, but I do now. I have not been angry at God, but I have just been feeling hurt after all I (we) have done all these years and it has to end like this.

Elder Holland’s video came to my mind and has been so very helpful, but I feel like I do not have another path right now like he did. I have been allowing myself to grieve and feel all the emotions and just trust and believe in His love and omnipotence. I am not sure if this makes sense. I feel there is just so much in my heart I want to share with you, but not sure how to put it into words, but I hope it helps in some way.

Thank you for your love, support, and encouragement. I love and appreciate you so very much. I will keep you in my prayers too.

Oh! I do not mind if you still use the spotlight. Thank you!

💖Always, Kimee

Sept 14, 2023

Hi Kimberly, man you’ve been through a lot. Thank you for sharing, and for your love and prayers. I’m sure your story isn’t over, it will be interesting to see how things—whatever they may be—unfold going forward.

Sept 15, 2023

Thank you Leslie! … I feel like I have a lot of decisions to make, but not sure the best path right now, besides trusting, but I know I need to act. …I answered all the [Mindset Mastery course] questions and saved them all and took good notes, so I can review them … instead of relying on my memory for all I learned.

Thank you again for everything. Have a wonderful weekend. Kimee

Four months later…

January 25, 2024

I received another update just a days before her spotlight was in queue to be published. Just in time for inclusion:

Hey Leslie, I hope you are doing so wonderful and that you had a joyful CHRISTmas and New Years too! I just wanted to share my weekly messages [to my family] since the New Year and give you a miraculous update in the Whipple house.

As you know, it’s truly incredible when you surrender to what is and completely trust God—that’s all you can do!! We love God’s timing! It’s the BESTESTEST!! …

Destin and I were blessed with a Joyful Happy New Year Miracle—born New Years Day 2024. He’s so precious and perfect! We are still in the NICU with him—he’s been in no rush to eat with a bottle! He’s precious and loves mommy and daddy—especially daddy singing to him, skin to skin with mommy and daddy, massage, MFR, and sleeping. Thank you for your thoughts and prayers.

“There is a light that emanates from every newborn, bringing a special bond of love that can fill their parents’ hearts with joy.“ ~Valeri V. Cordón~

“I have learned that when a newborn first squeezes his father’s [and mother’s] finger in his tiny fist, he has caught [them] forever.” ~Johnny Welch~

“It is a sacred event every time a child is born.” ~Russell M. Nelson~

I know every word of these quotes are true! Thank you for your love, support, and prayers for our precious miracle. We are home now from NICU and he is so happy! We are doing great, experiencing each moment by moment, focusing on what matters most, and continuing to ride on the wings of God’s great goodness!!

This is the quote [below] I was planning on sending for New Years, but as you now know God had something much more important and miraculous He wanted me to share—our precious Todd. But the timing of this message is perfect because our precious Little Todd is evidence that there truly is a God, His goodness is great, and He does divinely intervene in ways that are impossible without Him (Luke 1:37).

“Quit living as if the purpose of life is to arrive safely at death. Set God-sized goals. Pursue God-ordained passions. Go after a dream that is destined to fail without divine intervention. Keep asking questions. Keep making mistakes. Keep seeking God.

“Stop pointing out problems and become part of the solution. Stop repeating the past and start creating the future. Stop playing it safe and start taking risks. Expand your horizons. Accumulate experiences. Enjoy the journey. Find every excuse you can to celebrate everything you can. Live like today is the first day and last day of your life.

“Don’t let what’s wrong with you keep you from worshiping what’s right with God. Burn sinful bridges. Blaze new trails. Criticize by creating. Worry less about what people think and more about what God thinks. Don’t try to be who you’re not. Be yourself. Laugh at yourself. Don’t let fear dictate your decisions. Take a flying leap of faith. Chase the lion!” ~Mark Batterson

Thank you so much for ALL your prayers and support!! Never stop trusting God! He always has something better than you could ever imagine!!

Always, Kimee

There is nothing more to say, Kimee, you said it all so perfectly. Thank you for sharing such a sacred journey with us. We wish you all the best with your sweet new little one!
______________

Leslie Householder
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